Dick vs a great big bag of dicks
by Skylinemaster
Summary: Two dicks fighting. One Leviathan, one Archangel. Oh, Gabriel and Edgar are also fighting. One-shot.


Hello there, Skylinemaster here with a one-shot Supernatural fic.

Please enjoy.

Disclaimer: I don't own anything from Supernatural.

* * *

On the beaten path on during a stormy night, a stretch limousine comes to a halt. A peculiar place for a stop, in the middle of the countryside, but the place for the meeting is inside.

The limosinune's right passenger door opened up, revealing a slender Asian woman dressed in a business suit. She walked to the rear, opening the door for the important ones in the limo.

The first to disembark was a heavyset Latino man, dressed in a jean jacket and blue jeans. The next, a dashing Caucasian man, dressed in a bespoke black suit. The Caucasian man looked at his smartphone, and then the hotel that they were in front of.

"Elysian Fields."

The man smiled, as he glanced at the Asian woman.

"Susan, is the Eight o clock still on?"

He asked politely with a smile on his face.

"Yes, Mr. Roman ."

Susan said to the now identified Richard Roman.

"Great..."

Roman said, turning to his second in command.

"Well Edgar, we won't want to be later for our appointment with the Devil himself."

* * *

"I'm not getting in that thing."

Kali said. Dean just rolled his eyes at this.

"Just get in the car, princess."

Dean said as he noticed a limousine parked in front of the hotel.

Normally he would warn the driver that the Devil and the Trickster are inside, having a family moment, but today he has bigger issues. So he just got in the Impala, hoping that the limousine and its inhabitants would be okay.

* * *

Dick Roman whistled as he made his way to the counter of the hotel. He rung the bell, and waited for a few moments. He passed the time by admiring the lavish decor of the hotel.

'Might want to replicate this for Roman Taj Mahal.'

He thought with a smile.

Dick, now getting impatient, leaned over the counter to see the deceased Mercury.

"Hm, the party's already started."

Roman remarked as he motioned for Edgar to follow him.

* * *

"Brother, don't make me do this. "

Lucifer pleaded.

A slow clap was soon heard in the room, causing Gabriel and Lucifer to turn angrily to their new unwanted guests.

"Now, I'm sorry for interrupting what must have been a touching family reunion between you two, but I have an eight o clock meeting with the Devil and it cannot wait. I am a busy man after all."

Richard Roman said, smiling at the two Archangels. The scowl on Lucifer's face met with the smirk on Edgar's.

Gabriel meanwhile, had his eyes wide opened at the two new guests.

"Leviathan!"

He said, surprised.

"Indeed. Nice to see you again, brother."

Edgar said, sarcastically.

Dick Roman looked at his wristwatch, and then back at the two frowning Archangels.

"Now, I would love nothing more than to have a dramatic monologue about us Leviathans being better than you Angels..."

He said, further angering the two Archangels. He buttoned his blazer as he said these words.

"...But I am high on the need to kill, and short on time, so let's just get this over with. I do have a nine o clock with the President."

He finished, throwing his blazer onto a nearby chair. The Head Leviathan shot a glance at Edgar, who nodded at him.

The two Leviathan refocused their attention on the Archangels, and charged them.

Edgar rushed the panicked Gabriel, who stabbed him with the Archangel Blade to no effect. Edgar smiled as Gabriel punched him in the face, sending him flying back into a wall.

Edgar got up, removing the blade from his stomach and putting it in his waistband.

"Call me old fashioned, but I like to settle things man to man."

Edgar said, putting his hands up in a boxing position.

He prodded towards the Archangel, before getting in range to throw a hook. The hook narrowly missed the Archangel, but the follow up punch didn't. Gabriel was sent flying by the Leviathan's right cross, and skidded on the floor to a halt after.

Gabriel dusted himself off, and stood back up. He stared at the Leviathan for a few moments, and wondered why nothing happened.

Edgar rolled his eyes at this.

"Your petty attempts at distortion won't work on me."

Edgar said, closing the distance between them and sending Gabriel to the ground with a headbutt.

"I'm done, now."

Edgar said, taking the blade out of his waistband, and plunging it into the prone Gabriel's body. Gabriel screamed out as a giant white flash of light filled the room.

* * *

Meanwhile on the other side of the room, the Head Leviathan and the Devil were having a much more violent fight.

Lucifer was bleeding from his nose, and some of that blood made its way onto Dick's buttoned up white shirt.

"It's custom."

Dick spat out, wiping off the dirt from his mouth with his forearm, as he had rolled up his sleeves during the fight.

Dick grabbed the Devil by the collar and hurled him to the ground. When he followed, the Devil turned around and grabbed him by the legs and pushed him to the ground.

Lucifer quickly got on top, punching the Leviathan in the mouth multiple times.

"We, are, better, than, you!"

Lucifer said, each word followed by a punch to the grinning mouth of Dick.

"Maybe after your little genocide campaign is stopped, I should hire you as a comedian."

Dick said, grabbed Lucifer by the throat and pushing him off. Dick then got back up to his feet, only to be met by a chair to the head.

Dick smiled, grabbed a table and lifting it over the Devil's head, only to have it come crashing down.

Lucifer stumbled back as Dick marched forward. The Leviathan kicked the Devil's left leg, only to be met by a looping right hand to the temple.

This time, the Leviathan stumbled back. The Devil smiled at this, and grabbed the Leviathan by the back of his neck and elbowed him in the face with his free arm.

Dick grinned, as he kneed the Devil in the stomach, and then hit him in the back of the head with an open palm.

The Devil reeled back as he fumbled around for a weapon. He managed to grab a bottle, and hit the Leviathan over the head with it.

The Leviathan retailated with an uppercut that rocked Lucifer. The Leviathan lunged at Lucifer, only to be met by an arm through the chest.

The Leviathan looked down in horror at the arm through chest, and then stared at the Devil, who has smiling.

The Leviathan's face did a complete turnaround to one of laughter.

"Did you really think that would work?"

Dick asked, as Lucifer looked down in shock, seeing an arm from the Leviathan through his chest.

The Devil coughed up black blood as Dick slid back to get the Devil's arm out of him, while maintaining his own arm in.

"Now, the Morningstar will set."

Black blood oozed from the mouth,eyes, and nose of the kneeling Devil. Lucifer gagged for a few moments before collapsing to his side, dead.

"Susan!"

Dick called out. The Leviathan in question appeared in the doorway, awaiting her boss's commands.

"Fetch me a new suit."

He said, grabbing tablecloth to wipe his hands.

"The Amosu, the Hughes, or the Kiton?"

She asked as Edgar rejoined him.

"The Hughes. Want to look my best for the President."

Dick said as he threw the cloth down after he finished with it.

"Of course, it will be ready."

She said, disappearing from the doorway.

"Come now Edgar, we have places to be."

Dick said, walking out of the room, with Edgar following closely behind.

Edgar stopped in the doorway, turning around to see Gabriel's lifeless body.

"Leviathan beats Archangel..."

Edgar shifted his gaze to the deceased Morningstar.

"...Twice."

* * *

Was inspired to write this earlier. Please review.

Have a merry Christmas and a happy new year.


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